76 lines
2.9 KiB
Plaintext
76 lines
2.9 KiB
Plaintext
[0000] Each tombstone has an epitaph written on it.
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[0001] 1643
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Here lies Newberry Will,
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His life was finished 'cause he took ill,
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But none'll miss him, he should've been wiser,
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'Tis his own fault, for bein' such a miser.
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[0002] Here lies the body of Mary Ann Lowder,
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She burst while drinking a seidlitz powder,
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Called from this world to her heavenly rest,
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She should have waited till it effervesced.
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[0003] To the ever living memory of Hiram Bennet,
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baby son of Edward and Sarah Bennet,
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who by a sudden-surprize fell asleep,
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the 11th day of November, 1553
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Aged 6 months.
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[0004] Six feet beneath
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This funeral wreath
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Is laid upon the shelf
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One Jerry Jones,
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Who dealt in bones,
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And now he's bones himself.
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[0005] Lord Coningsby
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1559 to 1626
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Sleepeth here in peace:
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an honorable man, a valiant soldier.
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He served his country well.
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[0006] I plant these shrubs upon your grave, dear wife,
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That something on this spot may boast of life.
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Shrubs must whither and all earth must rot;
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Shrubs may revive: but you, thank heaven, will not.
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[0007] Beneath this stone, a lump of clay,
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Lies Uncle Peter Dan'els,
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Who, early in the month of May,
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Took off his winter flannels.
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[0008] Dr. I Letsome
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When people's ill they come to I,
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I physics, bleeds, and sweats 'em;
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Sometimes they live, Sometimes they die;
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What's that to I? I Letsome.
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[0009] Here I lie with my three daughters,
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Who died drinking Chelt'nam waters.
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If we had stuck to Epsom Salt,
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We should not sleep in this cold vault.
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[0010] Strong and athletic was my frame;
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Far from my native home I came,
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And manly fought with Simon Byrne;
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Alas! but liv'd not to return.
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Reader, take warning by my fate,
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Lest you should rue your case too late;
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If you have ever fought before,
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Determine now to fight no more.
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[0011] Thorp's Corpse.
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[0012] There is nothing of importance in the old tree.
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[0013] One of the graves is marked by a cross.
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[0014] An old, rotting tree adds appropriate charm to the decrepit cemetery.
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[0015] The hole is empty.
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[0016] This run-down, gloomy cemetery gives you the creeps! Many of the old tombstones have fallen over, and the entire place is overgrown with grass and weeds.
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[0017] Try somewhere else. The ground is too hard here.
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[0018] You don't know what to dig for...yet.
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[0019] You have nothing to dig with.
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[0020] The terrifying zombie senses your obsidian scarab. It immediately retreats and goes back to whence it came.
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[0021] To wander forever is now your fate.
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[0022] Oh, Oh! You've broken your shovel!
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[0023] You dig a small hole at the grave of the old miser. Aha! You have found a bag of gold coins!
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[0024] You carefully dig a small hole at the poor baby's grave. What is this?! You have uncovered a silver baby rattle!
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[0025] You dig a small hole at the grave of the Lord of the Manor. Gotcha! You have found an impressive Medal of Honor!
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[0026] You dig a small hole...but find nothing of interest.
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[0027] You bend down, pick it up, and carry it with you.
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